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Writer's pictureNeha Varughese

Making Self-Esteem Your Personality’s Best Companion

We all hold varying opinions about multiple matters, especially about ourselves. Do you ever take time to think about who you are? Or what values or beliefs do you hold? If you can value or perceive yourself, then your personality has accompanied its best partner: Self-esteem.


The birth of self-esteem in you enables you to make thoughtful decisions, recognize your strengths, interact with others better, and much more. Self-esteem paves the way to explore new things, learn and develop the best version of “YOU” when it comes to teenagers. This is one factor that makes every individual unique from the other. When you have got a grip on your self-esteem, it follows you like a shadow. Well, not just an ordinary black shadow, but a bright shadow that colours your entire mental well-being.



Researchers have confirmed that a person with (high) self-esteem is valued by others and end up learning to value themselves. Sadly, a larger population has not yet got to know what it feels like to have self-esteem as their partner in their mental health journey. Either they are clueless about this concept, or situations around them could hinder them from developing their self-esteem. And so, they end up holding the label of low self-esteem, which can pose a danger to their mental well-being in the short and long run.


If we are to wonder what the reasons could be why individuals do not succeed in building self-esteem, there are so many to ponder on. A common fact is that the feelings experienced by one are a consequence of how they deal with their situations. Some of the most common causes contributing to low self-esteem include unsupportive social environments, being surrounded by unhealthy influences, encountering abuse(s) or trauma, and being bullied. Some of them also include facing stressful events, experiencing depression or anxiety, feeling lonely, performing poor at school/workplace, and so on.


When individuals assume that situations involve embarrassment or failure risks, tendencies to escape or avoid situations slowly develop. While this may feel alright initially for situations like trying some activities, making new friends, etc., this can gradually become unhealthy for one’s overall personality. Sometimes, they may even forget how to overcome these situations confidently.



Further, suppose the common traits of self-esteem are not identified or treated. In that case, it can give way to negative problems and consequences. Some involve an unstable relationship with close or new people, assume poor body image, and befriend low motivation. It also involves experiences negative moods (sad, shame, or anxiety), early engagement in sexual activities, consuming alcohol, taking drugs to feel good, etc.


Additionally, individuals holding low self-esteem tend to associate their minds with low self-worth and efficacy. This often questions their value as a person. Researchers suggest that the signs displayed by such individuals are along the same lines. Though differently expressed, the following indicate the signs of low-esteem individuals: engage in negative self- conversations, maintain low or zero interest levels, reduced motivation, compare with others, fear of embarrassment, avoid engaging in new opportunities, feeling less belonged or loved, fail to handle frustrations and much more.



So, everyone needs to add the picture of self-esteem to the frame of their personality. Recent studies have confirmed that when individuals inculcate a sense of positive self-esteem, the learning and development process they go through prepares them for a productive, positive, and healthy future. Those who sow seeds of self-esteem are likely to have strong roots of positive behavioural characteristics. These may include confidently facing unknown challenges no matter what the outcome could be, acting mature, being independent in terms of decision-making and managing basic things, helping others most of the time, being proud of achievements or accomplishments, learning to responsibly deal with varying moods swing, and so on.


The better way to wipe off the clashes between low self-esteem and a healthy personality is by focusing on ways to improve or gain self-esteem. First, identify the life aspects or situations that deflate your self-esteem. Second, eliminate habits of self-criticism. Instead, focus on developing your self-worth and compassionate nature. Third, even when working on your imperfections, realize that nobody can be perfect. Try being the best version of yourself. Four, avoid or, if possible, stop comparing yourself with others and focus on achieving your goals and dreams. Five, exercising or working out is a terrific way to build confidence and motivation. Six, even if negative situations wrap around you, consider them as the stepping stones for building positivity and high self-esteem. Finally, surrounding yourself with supportive social networks encourages you to hold a bold personality.

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